Amoris laetitia in the dioceses. Don Gentili (Cei): the new face of the pastoral care of the family

“When I met him the Pope said: ‘Now with Amoris Laetitia you have a lot of work’. I replied: ‘I do, but it’s a beautiful job.” The exchange of words between Francis and Fr Paolo Gentili, director of the Italian Bishops’ Conference’s (CEI) Office for the Pastoral Care of the Family, ahead of the opening of the latest General Assembly of the Bishops’ Conference, is an accurate snapshot of the commitment involving the whole Church. “In the past days – pointed out Fr Gentili – I have been devoting much efforts to the work inside dioceses.” When we spoke to him over the phone he was in Sicily for a meeting with permanent deacons on the post-Synodal apostolic exhortation Amoris laetitia. He will be in Corvara (Bolzano) for the Master in Marriage and Family sciences and for the Summer Course in the framework of the diploma in family ministry, promoted, inter alia, by the CEI Office for the Family. One commitment follows another. The stakes are high, Gentili said: “Rediscovering the true perfume of the family. Just think of the genuine flavour of freshly baked bread…Our parishes must return to emanate that authentic perfume of the family, of daily life.”

Fr Gentili, Amoris laetitia requires this commitment. In concrete terms, what changes for family ministry?

We have entered a completely new season! In short it could be said that the post-Synodal apostolic exhortation suggests going beyond the strictly pastoral bond to the benefit of a missionary, outgoing approach, close to every existential periphery.

It should be remembered – this is extremely important – that Amoris laetitia is the fruit of the almost two thousand-year long journey of the Church that involved ecclesial communities, notably through the two questionnaires, but not only… In fact many families that felt removed from the Church took part. The Synod Fathers took this into account. It emerges also in the document, which in the style of Pope Francis, with his vibrant, concrete language, draws close to family life, near its joys and hardships. This was duly considered in the pastoral plan.

With reference to the title of the Document, could we describe it as a form of pastoral ministry called to bear witness to the love of family life?

Indeed. Joy is a dimension that is strictly bound to love: it’s hard to experience joy when love is missing. Nuptial love in particular is critical to the future of humanity. This doesn’t necessarily mean that everything should always be perfect. We observe the daily life of our relationships: in many cases joy is intertwined with pain, sacrifice, limits, fragilities… and it becomes one with these dimensions.

That’s why we need a new outlook on the family.

The dream we must accomplish is “a Church attentive to the goodness which the Holy Spirit sows in the midst of human weakness” (Amoris laetitia n.308). Thus it is a Church that has a totally new approach towards weakness, that is deeply rooted in the Gospel, of accompaniment, discernment and integration.

“To accompany, discern and integrate weaknesses”, as highlighted in chapter 8 of the Exhortation. Is this the great challenge?

It’s a new approach that should become concrete action throughout our Communities. It entails giving living form to the “law of graduality” contained in Saint John Paul II’s Familiaris Consortio, yet to be developed.

The great challenge also consists in being able to see the seeds of goodness present in the heart of every human person.

In his visit to the city of Prato (whose inhabitants belong to 127 different ethnic groups), shortly before delivering the opening remarks of the meeting in Florence, the Pope underlined that “For a disciple of Jesus no neighbour can become distant. On the contrary, there are no distant people who are too far removed, but only neighbours to reach out to.” I realize that it’s not simple and that we’re facing also a certain degree of diffidence. But the present historical circumstances require this change of pace. How can proximity take place in case of cohabitant partners, common law couples, and those who have no intention to create a spousal bond? There are many different situations we are confronted with on a daily basis. This requires increased formation on the part of pastoral workers – be they priests, married couples or deacons, along with a greater welcoming approach to proclaim marriage as a liberating grace, and not as a cage involving a set of obligations and rules.

Would you agree that this change of pace is also expected from the political realm?

Of course I do! In our societies young people are increasingly dependent on the support of their grandparents’ small pensions. This fact should spur on and elicit new family policies corresponding to an authentic recognition of the family.

I believe that Amoris laetitia solicits institutions to see in the family the lifeblood of social coexistence

From your special “observatory” could you give us a snapshot of the response to Amoris Laetitia in Italian dioceses? What are the most relevant aspects?

Those who are on the defence, who fail to see Amoris laetitia as an act of the Church – for this is what it is – have great difficulties. Conversely, those who fully acknowledged this synodal reflection, feel part and parcel of the Exhortation and seek to put it into practice in the daily life of their ecclesial reality and of the society in which they live. However, we should always remember – as Pope Francis reminds us – that reality is stronger than ideas.

Thus the hope is that the new seeds that are sprouting may grow into wheat, which, notwithstanding some inconvenience, may usher in a new epoch for the Church, closer to people. A real Church of the people.

These suggestions remind us of the “new humanism”: a central theme of the National Ecclesial Conference in Florence. In particular, there appears to be a constant reminder of the five paths (going out, proclaiming, inhabiting, educating, transfiguring) which the Italian Church is committed in. The five ways of Florence magnificently correspond to the pages of this Exhortation. These avenues were paved by Evangelii gaudium, which is the preferential door opening up to Amoris laetitia. Through the lenses of the Gospel going out means giving birth to the culture of the encounter, overcoming all forms of conflict. Proclaiming means passing from the domestic dimension to a family-friendly Church. Inhabiting is an invitation to be near the homes, namely to be a Church present in people’s homes. Thus educating implies caring for the integral formation of the human person, while transfiguring means giving new impetus to daily life, with its imperfections, in the dimension of “forever.”

In short, it’s an all-round commitment, encompassing all the seasons of spousal love.

Exactly. Accompaniment of couples as they prepare for marriage is not the exclusive competence of family ministry.

A step forward was taken inside the Church: the family has become the unifying place of all forms of pastoral action where everyone can find a “factory of hope.”